Voice-Overs

Tuesday night, after my last post, I figured I should look at the statistics of my blog.  I was quite surprised.

What I found was a world full of Sophomores, from Japan, Russia, all over Europe and of course here in the United States, with quite a few others reading along for the ride.  For those of you who come and check on me every once in a while, I have to say thanks.  After seeing how many people are reading along, I turned off the lamp next to my desk, stood up, hit the button to turn off the computer monitor, then went into my bedroom, grabbed Teddy and let him know how grateful I was for all of you, because now I don't feel so alone on the journey.  So, thanks for being here for me.

I was almost tempted to make t-shirts to sell on CaféPress for all of you, but I had second thoughts after I saw another late night movie courtesy of iTunes, and believe it or not, it was Sex and the City 2.

My only problem with the whole SATC thing is that well, I have a problem with Sarah Jessica Parker's character of Carrie.  Now, right out of the gate, you should know that I never saw the second SATC film in the theaters because of the movie poster, which I won't post here, but sufficed to say, my ex had just left with the Bassett and her name just happens to be Carrie.  When I saw large posters plastered up all over town promoting the film with the phrase, "Carrie On," well, still an overwhelming feeling of nausea tends to creep up on me because Carrie sure did carry on, and she carried off with my husband.  Yeah, it didn't make the second film featuring the girls from NYC very appealing.  To see two hours plus enslaved to the selfish whims of a chick named Carrie really made me want to put a metaphorical gun to my head and pull the imaginary trigger.  It was something I could have definitely gone without for the rest of my life.

Now, almost 20 months later, I figured I was due for a comedy and by the way my mother had spoken about it, the film had potential.  To be honest, I never watched Sex and the City for the character of Carrie.  I've always found the character of Carrie to be flaccid, over-indulged and overwhelmingly self-centered.  Every time the story got deep about Carrie, I always flipped channels, waited a few minutes then switched back to see the story I really wanted to see.  Put bluntly, I watched for Samantha.  Samantha is one of my heroes because she's not afraid to be independent or shy about her sex drive.  As Rosalind Russell said in the film Auntie Mame, "Live, Live, Live.  Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death."  Well, as far as Samantha goes, she steps up to the table and fills her plate and you know what, that's not a bad thing at all.  So, armed with 7-up and crackers to ease my queasy stomach, I flipped on iTunes and hit the button to rent the movie.

When the film started out, I was laughing almost from the start.  Stanford and Anthony's wedding complete with Liza Minnelli and swans set me up to relax and enjoy the two hour plus "extravaganza".  Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) this time around was relaxed, funny and really engaged in what was happening around her, very much the opposite of the emotional detachment she always had from her family in the past.  In this SATC, Miranda came in on top, she was a real standout and she gave life to the very hokey storyline.  To tell the truth, just like her arranging the camel ride and lunch in the film, she also saved the film by a landslide.

By the time the girls reached their destination, Abu Dhabi, the film would have gone completely south if it weren't for Miranda.  She saved the day so many times, I lost count.  Samantha and her menopause dramas got old quickly, and Charlotte's strait-laced fake shocks were just lost on me.  Then there was Carrie, selfish, self-absorbed, and driving poor Mr. Big nuts.  It was at that point that I just lost interest in the rest of the film because it became more about their surroundings than it was about the characters.

But it was early on in the film that I realized Taz is my Mr. Big. (Funny thing, I just realized both of their pseudonyms are three letters...I so did not plan that.) He's the guy who outside of his outstanding attribute...(yep, I went there...girls, just smile and nod...just go with it like the gals in SATC do)...he's the guy that I've waited 10 years to have an amazing relationship with, someone I've loved practically forever trying to see if he's going to meet me halfway.  It was then that the scene came up where Carrie is bitching at Big that she wants to go out and "have some "sparkle" in their relationship".  Watching her have my words come out of her mouth made me want to curl up into a ball and die.  I felt like a real horse's ass arguing with Taz when all he wants is some simple peace and quiet until he gets his knee fixed and there I am bitching at him that I just have to go out.  What happened to the patience that I brag I have?   When did I become a selfish, self-absorbed bonehead?  Well, one thing I can say for myself, I don't dress like Carrie, some of her get-ups are just awful, I don't care what the trends are.

But it really doesn't matter how I dress, the gut check is there, I need to be more patient with MY Mr. Big.  What's worse of it all, in the same scene, there's Mr. Big (channeling Taz almost word for word) telling Carrie that he's seen the world and that he's gone out and that he didn't need to go out to be happy.   Back into the hole I went.  I felt even smaller.

See, that's why I love movies so much.  Movies are one of those things that can slap you around and make you realize what you're doing.  Yeah, I'm going to have to apologize to him later today.  The last couple of calls between Taz and I have been rather tense and not our regular garden variety verbal jousts, but two people walking on eggshells around each other.  Remember I said, if one even senses they hurt the other, they go into retreat?  Yeah, it's been that way for the last week.

Something has got to give here.  When did I become Carrie from Sex and the City?  You know a long time ago, right when the show first came out, someone actually told me I had a Sarah Jessica Parker vibe, and right now, 10 years later, I get what they were saying.  I need to make myself a t-shirt that says, "Selfish" on it really, really big because it's taken me forever to get how selfish I can be sometimes.

But even though she's selfish, Carrie always seems to figure everything out and discover the error in her ways.  Maybe it'll work like that for me too, I just don't want to go through life making stupid mistakes and regretting everything only to have to play catch-up and apologize.  Maybe someday I'll get it right.

And maybe, just like a scene cut straight from the movie, we'll get to hear the voice-over...

"And finally the day came, Mr. Taz got his leg all fixed up.  Through it all, even though life sometimes gives us ups and downs, sometimes it's just worth the wait."

So today, our song for the day comes from the music featured in the film.  Cyndi Lauper's "True Colors."