Sunday, March 21, 2010

It's been eleven months...

I've always been temporally challenged.  Yes, that's right, time means nothing to me.  I have a collection of 20 Swatches because I think time is such a unique object.

When I sit at my computer, time flies by.  It waves as it goes by, marking it's existence on the little bitty digital clock in the corner of my screen.  Otherwise, time truly means nothing to me.

That's why today I'm having a unique experience.  I noticed as I was cleaning up around the apartment that it has been eleven months since my ex has lived here.  Looking at the apartment, you can tell the difference in a heartbeat.  The bedroom is different, my office is different, the living room is different, everything has changed so much since I have been putting my life back together after that train wreck of an ex had the door hit him in the ass on the way out.

Today, I finally, after all these months, got rid of the last notion of my ex in my apartment.  The guest bathroom.  Before it was decorated in celestial, that's right, sun, moon and stars, and I replaced it all with flowers.  The celestial was all dark blue and yellow (the ex's favorite color combination) and I replaced it with pinks, purples, white, and pastel yellow.  After I took his shower curtain down and replaced it with mine, hung up the decorative towels and replaced the floor mat, it took just a moment of me admiring my work to feel the weight of his presence being lifted off my shoulders.  I have to say it was a rush, and it felt good. 

I had to start his car the other day.  Ok, go ahead, ask.  "Sheri, why are you starting his car if he lives in Kentucky with the bassett hound faced bitch?"  Because, genius left his car here because he had to drive the rental truck with all of his and her shit in it while she drove her car behind him.  So, he's basically dropped all of his responsibilities in my lap.  I have to make sure the car is started and that it moves on occasion.  Here's where it gets sticky.

I'm all about how people infuse their energy into objects they regularly come in contact with.  You know what I'm talking about.  It's when you walk into someone's home and you know it's theirs because you can feel their presence or personality in every object.  Well, I got into the ex's car the other day to start it and I could feel a rush of negative energy rush out as I opened the door.  It made me shudder.  I sat in the driver's seat and saw all of the dog hair from that bitches chihuahua's all over the place and all of the lies and bullshit he put me through just came rushing back.  I sat there coated in that bastard's energy, nauseous and completely aghast on what my internal radar was picking up.  I realized at that moment that he intentionally did what he did to me.  He had no second thoughts, no remorse, no nothing.  He did the things he did specifically to hurt me because he felt intimidated and completely lacking next to me.  I did nothing to deserve what he did.  He did it out of spite, greed and inadequacy.   Sad, pathetic man if you ask me.  He lived every moment to make me feel lesser about myself, to put me down and to hurt me.  That was his trip.  He did it to his first wife, he did it to me and if that bassett hound faced bitch thinks she's any different, I've got news for her. we are at month number eleven.  The last bastions of that bastard has left the building...

Long live the Sher.

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